5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Randomize