Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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