I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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