Porn is love you can see.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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