I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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