I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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