I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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