I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize