If i come over, it means nothing
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Randomize