ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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