Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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