new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize