OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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