I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize