I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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