Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize