Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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