matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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