We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize