i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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