but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize