This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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