I cockslap morals
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
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