Just fell off a train. Bad.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize