One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i would punch a child for taco bell
I think my vagina is haunted
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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