R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
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