The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize