it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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