This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
These tits shall not be calmed
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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