Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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