we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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