I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize