What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize