Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize