I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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