you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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