I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Oh god it's open bar.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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