girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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