People in love make me want to vomit
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize