it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
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