As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize