Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
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