I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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