I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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