this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
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