I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize