escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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