she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
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So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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