the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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