She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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